on Derek "Not Gay" Hough: On Why His Sister Is Single at 15:27 11/21/2009

My Perezcious once tried picking up guys using a wing-woman. Regrettably, it was Beth Ditto that he chose.

on Twihard Tattoos!!! at 03:26 11/21/2009

My Perezcious thinks that quote is almost as wonderfully inspirational as those found inside greeting cards at a dollar store. (Just between you and me, he actually said "barf".)

on Carrie Prejean's Brother Is A Perv! at 13:44 11/20/2009

My Perezcious did NOT watch his sister dance around naked after the Perezcious made a peep-hole into her bedroom with a screwdriver.

on Joe Francis Sued By The IRS For Tens of Million$!!!! at 13:41 11/19/2009

My Perezcious is NOT JEALOUS that this scumbag tax-dodger was welcome to participate in last month's Gay March on Washington, yet the Perezcious was asked to stay well away.

on Kirstie Vs. Conan at 17:56 11/18/2009

My Perezcious always becomes queasy at the mere suggestion of anyone having his lingam bitten off.